"In today's world, we spend so much energy being right and proving others wrong," he says in the talk's description.
"Twenty years ago I wrote a best-selling book about dating that I'm now realizing misguided and even hurt some people.
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When a fresh, young face says something we like, we get excited. Does that mean we should never listen to young people? As I wrote of the Parkland teens, “in the long run, they’ll benefit much more from wizened adults who balance encouragement with guidance, than adults who praise them nonstop and shove them into an arena for which they’re ill-prepared.”Older adults must have the boldness to offer loving guidance and correction, as well as encouragement, to the youth in their communities.
And when a teen or young adult finds themselves in the spotlight, they should seek guidance, be eager to learn and remain aware of their own inexperience.
I no longer agree with [the book’s] central idea that dating should be avoided.
I now think dating can be a healthy part of a person developing relationally and learning the qualities that matter most in a partner. [In the book] There are other weaknesses too: in an effort to set a high standard, the book emphasized practices (not dating, not kissing before marriage) that are not in the Bible.
But this post isn’t about my thoughts on dating vs. (You can read those here and here.) Regardless of whether you agree with 1997 Harris or 2018 Harris, we can all take two warnings and an example from his statement.
Harris admits that his book “emphasized practices …
I'm hoping that my experience of listening to my critics and reevaluating my conclusions will inspire others to see that progress and growth always involves the humbling process of admitting mistakes." Harris wrote "I Kissed Dating Goodbye" when he was 20 years old, had been homeschooled his entire life, and had not yet been in a dating relationship.
The book discusses the problems with contemporary "recreational dating" and presents "biblical courtship" as an alternative.
Even so, the pitfalls that many Christians succumbed to with its publication still litter the ground today.